Letterman News

Well, Dave's been at it again.


According to the AP, a Santa Fe woman claims that Dave's been wooing her from afar, by using "code words, gestures and eye expressions to convey his desires for her." According to the application for a temporary restraining order, she said he asked her to be his wife during a televised "teaser" for his show by saying, "Marry me, Oprah." Her letter said Oprah was the first of many code names for her and that the coded vocabulary increased and changed with time.

The woman contends that although she started the affair, by sending Letterman "thoughts of love" starting in 1993, she has now requested that Letterman, who tapes his show in New York, stay at least 3 yards away and not "think of me, and release me from his mental harassment and hammering." She claims that Letterman has forced her to go bankrupt and caused her "mental cruelty" and "sleep deprivation" since May 1994.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Mr. Letterman disputes the allegations. Perhaps he could air any grievances as part of HSI's Festivus entry below.